Faye McDonough

Sometimes slowing down is the fastest way forward…

2019-2023 were my Fitness Years.

That meant:

• Training most days
• 150+ mile bike rides with my best mate for fun
• Competitions galore: 10+ in 2023 (including 3 Hyrox)
• A LOT of burpees
• Becoming the friend you go to for fitness and wellbeing advice

When the health condition I was using exercise and nutrition to manage came back regardless in 2024, I thought “what’s the point?”, jacked it all in and went back to the drawing board.

It was tempting to never visit the gym or go near a protein shake again!

When Your System Stops Working

There’s something particularly devastating about watching something you’ve invested years perfecting suddenly stop delivering results.

For four years, I’d built an identity around being the fit friend, the one with discipline, the person who showed up consistently. Exercise wasn’t just my hobby – it was my medicine, my stress relief, and my source of confidence.

When my health condition returned despite all that effort, it felt like a fundamental failure of everything I’d believed about taking control of my wellbeing.

The Temptation to Give Up Completely

The all-or-nothing thinking kicked in hard. If intense training wasn’t working, why bother with any movement at all? If careful nutrition wasn’t preventing health issues, why not just eat whatever?

This is where many of us get stuck – in the space between the approach that’s stopped working and figuring out what comes next.

Making Notable Swaps

But I’ve kept at it with some notable swaps:

Yoga for HIIT: Trading intensity for mindfulness and gentleness with my body

Acceptance for achievement: Some days a walk is the best I can do, and that’s genuinely enough

Journalling for escapism: Replacing the headspace created by a tough class with reflection and processing

Sleep for early morning workouts: Prioritising recovery over pushing through fatigue

A ‘going with the flow’ plan: Focusing on that day’s energy rather than programmed workouts

As a hyper-achiever (for better or worse), this has NOT been easy.

The Struggle with Slowing Down

I’ve frequently felt like I’ve failed and gone backwards. When you’re used to measuring progress through intensity, pace, and achievement, slowing down feels like regression.

Every gentle yoga session felt less valuable than a HIIT class. Every day I chose rest over a planned workout felt like weakness. Every time I listened to my body instead of pushing through felt like giving up.

The mental shift from always pushing harder to sometimes choosing gentleness has been one of the hardest adjustments I’ve made.

The Revelation of Slowing Down

I’m realising that maybe I’ve had to slow down to speed up.

Last weekend I achieved a surprising 5k Personal Best, powered on and paced by my lovely friend, Emily. It was a small win but a big confidence boost – that maybe I’m doing okay and the plan is working.

Maybe I can still do hard things.

This result surprised me because it came from a completely different approach. Instead of grinding through structured training plans, I’d been moving intuitively, resting when tired, and focusing on joy rather than performance.

You’re Not Alone in This

So I’m sharing this in case anyone else feels the same. In case anyone else is beating themselves up for failed resolutions and unfulfilled plans.

From speaking with friends, I know I’m not alone. Healthy habits can easily flip into unhealthy despite best intentions. Learning the hard way what you are and aren’t capable of seems to be the experience of many.

It’s a fine balance between pushing yourself and pushing too hard, between discipline and rigidity, between goals and obsession.

Finding Joy Again

Slowing down to find the joy again has been revelatory.

When wellbeing becomes about ticking boxes rather than feeling good, something important gets lost. The irony is that rediscovering enjoyment in movement has led to better results than years of forcing myself through workouts I didn’t want to do.

Wisdom from Friends

Other wise words from friends have included:

• You know best: Trust your instincts about what your body and mind need
• Anything is better than nothing: A walk counts, gentle movement counts, showing up in small ways counts
• Slow and steady wins the race: Sustainable practices beat intense bursts that lead to burnout

These reminders have been essential during moments when I’ve felt like I’m not doing enough.

Questions for Your Own Reflection

If you’re in your own wellbeing rut:

• What approach have you been forcing that might need adjusting?
• Where are you prioritising achievement over acceptance?
• What would listening to your body today actually look like?
• How could you redefine progress in your current situation?
• What would bringing more joy into your routine involve?

The Unexpected Path Forward

Sometimes the way out of a rut isn’t through more effort, more intensity, or more discipline. Sometimes it’s through less – less forcing, less rigidity, less self-criticism.

The hardest lesson has been accepting that progress doesn’t always look linear, and effective doesn’t always mean intense.

For fellow hyper-achievers: Your worth isn’t measured by your workout intensity or your ability to stick to rigid plans. Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is rest. Sometimes the strongest choice is gentleness.

For anyone struggling with failed resolutions: You haven’t failed if you’re still showing up, even if it looks different than you planned.

What’s Your Unexpected Way Out?

I’d love to know – what’s been your unexpected way out of a wellbeing rut? Has anyone else found their best progress came from slowing down?

What wisdom would you share with someone who’s struggling to find balance between pushing themselves and being kind to themselves?

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Post-race medal selfie from last week’s race, taken for the kids who love some medal bling and this one was a beaut. Sometimes the most meaningful victories come from approaches you never expected to work.